"The Dream Weaver" is an old poem I wrote a couple years ago, and even though this blog is about new beginnings I thought it would be a good way to start my creative journey back to writing.
This coming year will be all about change for me. My boyfriend Dan is a Marine who has just deployed for Afghanistan, and while he is gone I will be finishing my senior year at SUNY Brockport. I don't know what I'll end up doing after that, sense I am an English major who has no plans of ever teaching. People like to point that out, sense they believe that English major - teaching = failure. Even though I am unsure of the future and how 'successful' I will be, I beg to differ.
I have spent the last six years enrolling in school, then dropping out, then taking breaks and swearing to never go back. I tried liberal arts for a while, then communications, and a concentration in literature to set myself up for a teaching career, but nothing felt right. Finally I switched my concentration from literature to creative writing. It was no surprise to me to feel like college was no longer a pointless endeavor. What I was studying finally felt right.
I had to accept that the only way I was going to see the point in finishing school was to do something that I love, and have a reason to do. I love to write, and even though I sometimes wish it were different, I cannot see myself doing anything else with my life.
I have a strong desire to be creative again, but with that desire comes fear of failure. It is so hard to face a blank page with no clue of where to start or how to express the ideas that are racing through your mind. But I have to start somewhere, and the only way I find out if I've still got it or not is to get to work!
2 comments:
Congrats on getting an English degree. I wanted to go for an English degree, but a teacher convinced me that the only thing I could ever do with such a degree was teach, and that jobs where highly competitive.
It apparently never occurred to him that most people who go into advertising, public relations and marketing have degrees in English or something similar. So if I hadn't listened to him, I could be working in a highly creative field. As it is, I am a business analyst and now confine my creative activities to my blogs and to my writing. Sigh!
Thanks for following my blog!
Your welcome, though I probably should be the one thanking you! I got a chance to read over some of your blog today and I feel like you have a lot of insight and understanding about writing. I think your blog is so inspirational and I look forward to reading more!
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